Do you ever feel like that? Like no matter what you’re dealing with, the world just moves on oblivious to your problems? Well of course it does! You can’t really expect it to do otherwise. But sometimes it kind of sucks knowing that you have this shit going on and nobody knows or cares that it’s happening.
That doesn’t mean that nobody would care, chances are that someone would if you just told them about it. I know that’s hard to do sometimes, believe me I know. When I have shit going on, I just don’t want to communicate with anyone, I just want to deal with my shit alone; I tend to withdraw. Some of that comes from not wanting to bother anyone with my problems, I usually feel like a whiner when I talk about my shit, so I normally don’t talk about it.
The thing about that is if you don’t tell anyone, they can’t help you. I recently read an article about a couple in Ohio who felt so desperate over their own situation that they ended up committing suicide together. None of their neighbors even knew they needed help, many of them said “if they would have only asked, we could have helped them”.
Imagine how alone they must have felt not thinking they could tell their friends and neighbors about their situation. While reading the article, I felt how they must have felt because I’ve been there before myself; thinking there was no way out but death.
Some people think that suicide is cowardly, but it’s really not, it takes a lot to make the decision to end your own life. You weigh everything over and over again and question everything over and over again, knowing that the decision is final, that you can’t go back once it’s done.
But there is always someone who would be willing to help, if you just ask. It may not even be someone you know; it might be a stranger on the other end of the phone at a hotline. It may be clergy at a local church (even if you don’t belong to the church, most clergy will still be willing to talk to you). It may be your next door neighbor or it may even be a “friend” on Facebook.
And if you’ve tried to talk to people and haven’t found anyone to listen, keep trying! Eventually you’ll find someone to listen. Even if you can find just one person, just one, who will listen, then you’ve taken the first step. They may not be able to solve your problems but they might be able to help you to realize that you’re not alone and that things can get better, no matter how desperate they may seem at the time.
So please, please talk to someone if you feel you only have one way out. You matter and someone out there loves you, even if you don’t know who they are yet.